>>I would actually argue that the status quo for childcare is a 50/50 split. That ignores the fact that you and your wife currently live in the same house. That is a very different situation from the children spending 50% of their time at one address and 50% at another. That would normally be regarded as unsettling for children. It will only happen if that is what your wife also wants.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
>>But I also feel it is unreasonable to expect her living costs to be met solely by myself. Surely, both of us need to be able to support the children independently in our respective houses? Your wife's living costs are currently being met solely by you. That is the status quo. She also has the care of two children aged 5 and 8. It is unrealistic to expect her to become self sufficiby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Frankly you would be bonkers to try and settle this directly with your husband without taking your own independent legal advice. The sort of figures you are talking about here are such that any legal advice would very likely pay for itself many times over. For a start 1. You should not agree to a sale of the former matrimonial home except within the context of a formal and final financial sby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
>>I'm at an age where I can access my pension. What's to stop me from taking a lump sum and spending it and/or paying off debts? Well, if your wife became aware of your plans she could stop you implementing them by injunction. Assuming you were successful in doing it behind her back and spending the money then a court would be likely to say, 'You have had £100K. You may haby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
If there is a Mesher order the former matrimonial home is transferred into the sole name of one spouse subject to a charge in favour of the other. The spouse to whom the property is transferred undertakes the responsibility to pay the mortgage. However, if that spouse has no income then it may be that the only way she can pay the mortgage is from maintenance payments made by the other spouse.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Yes, it is one of the most common situations. If your wife remains in the house with the children then she will be unable to get you removed from the mortgage. The mortgage lender will not agree because her earnings are too low. There is no reason why they should take the risk of removing you from the mortgage and they cannot be compelled to remove your name. In these circumstances you can onlby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
A court will not approve any consent order unless it is clear that it has been signed by both parties. The clue is in the name - 'consent' order. A court will not presume consent. It needs evidence of it.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
If your wife is on a low income then you cannot accept the mortgage lender to agree to take you off the mortgage. You will therefore remain on the mortgage and that will make it difficult for you to obtain another one. There is no reason why at some point in the future you should not be able to have some share of the equity. However, whether that is practical very much depends upon the figures anby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Don't do it. Child maintenance should only be paid from income. You can only afford to pay what you can afford to pay if your income drops and there is a formula for calculating it. Your ex wife may not like this but if your income drops there is no good reason why she should be insured against the consequences at your expense. Your income is what it is.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Assuming he can afford to do so from income he should pay you sufficient child and spousal maintenance such that you should not need to eat up capital. Child and spousal maintenance is always capable of being varied if circumstances change so if he is not paying sufficient now you should raise that now regardless of whether circumstances change in April 2020.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
I see no reason why your husband should not pay you periodical payments until some fixed date in the future by which date you should be financially self sufficient. I see no obvious reason why he should buy out your maintenance claims now by way of a lump sum. To some extent he has already done that in the division of the existing capital. He will, of course, also need to pay child maintenance.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
You are talking about capital but you give no figures about what capital is actually available or, indeed, give any indication of the capital value of what you have already received. The figures matter.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Dear Anrdea56, only gullible fools believe in the sort of nonsense peddled by 'Dr' Okumas. I am quite sure he is real enough otherwise there would be no point to the scam. Whether his is really a 'Dr' and whether his real name is 'Okumas' is something else. By all means tell us what his 'doctorate' is in and what his physical address is. That shouldn'tby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
What you are proposing is not fair. You will forgive me but I really don't want to spend any further time on this. You are clearly intent upon ploughing your own furrow. If you want legal advice upon which you intend to rely I can see no reason why you should not pay for it because you are obviously in a position to do so. Any advice I have given you here has clearly fallen on deaf ears so Iby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Like I said, it is my opinion you should seek a divorce in the UK and settle any financial issues within the context of that divorce because that is where you are located and it is where the property is located. I have explained this at some length. You are free to ignore that advice. You are the one who will bear the consequences of ignoring it but you are an adult and free to make your own deciby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Your preference is a mistake. I have already explained the reasons why. I am not going to do so again. It will be you who will live with the consequences of your decisions not me.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
I have already told you that if the issue is property in the UK and you live here then you would be well advised to issue divorce proceedings in the UK regardless of the wishes of your spouse. It is possible under the 1984 Matrimonial and Family Proceedings Act to seek financial relief in the UK following a divorce obtained overseas. However, using that procedure is more complicated and expensiveby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Getting to the UK is your wife's problem. A divorce can go ahead here whether she can come here or not. As to the outcome, it is figures which matter. Also, of course, when you say 'contributions' you obviously mean money. However, a court does not measure contributions to a marriage in purely financial terms. Different spouses can contribute in different ways. Contributions are noby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
You can transfer the title of the property from joint names to your sole name regardless of any divorce if you are both agreed upon that. If you are not agreed upon it then that is a different matter. In that event you would probably find it better to get a divorce in the UK and have the property dealt with in the context of that divorce.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Where you stand is that you are not entitled to anything. 1. Pension sharing is only available to couples beginning divorce proceedings after the legislation came into force (1 December 2000). You were divorced in 1999. 2. You remarried in 2003 so unless any financial claims were made in the divorce petition and you were the person who issued the divorce petition you will have lost your rigby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Just as an aside if you live in England and your ex wife and children live in Scotland are you sure that issuing a court application about contact is sensible? Now, I don't actually know how far apart you and the children live. So far as I know you may each live within a few miles of the Scottish border. However, the chances are that in fact you live a long way away from the children. Ifby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
I doubt that contact with children has anything to do with the financial issues arising from the marriage. If you and your ex were disputing who the children should live with that might conceivably be relevant. However, before you go darting down that path if the children have habitually lived with your ex in Scotland it is very likely not realistic to be seeking residence.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
You will need to speak to a lawyer in Scotland about that. Since you were divorced in England and you live there you can certainly use the English courts to resolve the financial issues arising from the marriage. Whether you can also use the Scottish courts only a lawyer qualified to practise in Scotland can tell you.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
>> looks like her solicitors advice to play down her earnings and make out she is having a bad year is working and the other side would never be able to prove as all cash takings, those are the actual figures. If any solicitor has given any such advice it would be a disciplinary matter and a possible contempt of court. All solicitors are officers of the court and as such their duty to tby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
I think that is the minimum he can expect. If these are actually the figures then I doubt whether such a division in itself would be fair. It may be that he would get a charge on the former matrimonial home of a percentage of its value such a charge not to be capable of being enforced until the children cease to be dependent, or his wife dies or remarries whichever shall happen soonest. The capitby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
>> my friend is self employed and has hidden a lot of her money to declare her earnings as £5k a year self employed So basically you are saying she is dishonest. After a relationship of 14 years and total capital of £330,000 I very much doubt that it would be reasonable to divide capital 90/10 in the wife's favour. If this situation was reversed and it was the husband who was claimiby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Look, if your spouse is in another country and service is likely to be an issue then YOU, not the court, needs to sort out whatever method of service is required to prove that the divorce petition has been received by your spouse. This can be done in many ways but it is the responsibility of the person issuing the petition and not the responsibility of the court. I deal with clients (and their spby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
It is rarely a good idea to speculate what financial circumstances will be in two years' time. All sorts of things can happen - perhaps an inheritance, lottery win, one spouse develops an illness etc.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
I did NOT say that. I said 'as long as service can be proved'. Service can be proved in a number of different ways. It is not a question of the courts 'knowing'. It would be YOU who would to prove service or to effect service if necessary.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
You would be unwise to rely upon 'sounds like'. Facts are what matter and, in particular, figures. So long as your question is based on generalities rather than solid facts it is incapable of meaningful answer. And that goes for anyone else's two ha'p'orth.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum