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This is a UK based forum about divorce and related issues. Feel free to contribute. Your experiences or opinions may help others. The link to the home page on the left leads to basic information about most common divorce questions. You can use the search function to search the forum
Re: Probability of a Clean Break (is all I want 
) - 6 months ago
Well, frankly, it was bonkers not to get a divorce and get financial issues sorted once for all as soon as you separated. Paying the mortgage and bills as well as remaining on a joint account with your wife has done you no favours. Basically you have been maintaining your wife for the last five years even though she apparently works. Why should she not want this to continue? If you have not alreby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: CONSENT ORDER? - 6 months ago
Her solicitor will draft any document for her benefit rather than yours. Before you signed any such document you would be wise to get your own independent legal advice. Better still get a solicitor acting on your behalf to draft it rather than leaving it to hers.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Reasonable Reduction in Income - 6 months ago
1. Assuming your wife has been studying for a degree in preparation for employment (ie a degree in something like nursing rather than history of art) then, yes, it would reasonable to assume that when she has finished she will actually take up that employment. 2. It would look like a deliberate attempt to reduce your income. On the last point, you should remember that in divorce courts areby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Stay of execution of the decree Absolute??? - 6 months ago
Unfortunately it is significant. By applying for decree absolute before financial issues were formally and finally resolved you have deprived your ex wife of benefiting from your pension in the event of your death prior to financial issues being settled. For this reason they could have prevented you from applying for decree absolute if they had realised you were going to apply for it before finanby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Just issued divorce proceedings - 6 months ago
If there are no dependent children and your husband is under no disability it is unlikely that this is a case where it would be appropriate for you to pay him maintenance.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Stay of execution of the decree Absolute??? - 6 months ago
>>I did mention to her solicitor via a letter that I would not apply for the absolute until we'd sorted out the financials Then you may have a problem. Clearly the reason your wife's solicitor did not take action before decree absolute was because you had told them that you would not do so until financial issues were resolved and if you told them by letter then there is clear eby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Stay of execution of the decree Absolute??? - 6 months ago
You should write to them (keeping a copy of the letter) saying that unless they give legally valid reasons for their request and an explanation of why they waited until decree absolute had been granted then in the event that they make an application you will be the one making an application for costs and you will be producing this letter before the court. They cannot expect you to agree to thiby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Contest after acknowledge - 6 months ago
So far as I know it is no longer possible to contest a divorce. It used to be but the rules have changed. After all, if one spouse makes an application for divorce the marriage is over no matter what the other spouse may think. That has always been the case but the recent rule change now makes it next to impossible to defend a divorce.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Reducing hours at work - 6 months ago
I am not sure there is much money to be made from breeding dogs unless by dog thieves and puppy farms. I breed German Shepherd Dogs. When you factor in dog food, stud fees, Kennel Club registrations, hip and elbow scores, tests for haemophilia, degenerative myelopathy, pituitary dwarfism etc, vaccinations, progesterone tests and qualifying for IPO titles and breed surveys the whole things is a moby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Clean break and consent order - 6 months ago
1. You need a court order within the context of a divorce. This court order can embody terms of settlement which have been agreed between you but you need a court order to dismiss all claims arising from the marriage once for all. 2. It is done in parallel although it would be an odd marriage where neither spouse knows anything about the financial circumstances of the other. 3. It is not esby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Reducing hours at work - 6 months ago
The fact that your wife has had no earned income for the last seven years and that there are three young children will tend to make this expensive for you. Having said that, the courts do try to be fair and so it is unlikely you would be asked to pay so much that you would have to wonder what the point of getting out of bed in the morning was. If your wife can reasonably be expected to acquire soby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Reducing hours at work - 6 months ago
It would be seen as a way of you trying to pay less. What matters is your earning capacity. If you choose to reduce that earning capacity voluntarily then the only person who should suffer the financial consequences of that will be you rather than your wife and children. That is how a court would look at it. If they adopted any other approach it would enable people to run rings around the courts.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Paying the bills - 6 months ago
No, child maintenance is to pay for everything to do with raising a child including contributing towards the utility bills in the home in which they live. It is not 'meant' solely for the purposes to which you say it should be applied. Also, he does not have an income 4.5 times yours. He earns whatever he does less the child maintenance he pays you and you earn whatever you earn plus thby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Paying the bills - 6 months ago
You are receiving child maintenance and you also have an income of your own. It is not reasonable that your husband should also be paying all the bills. That is what child maintenance is supposed to be for after all. That is not to say that you should necessarily be paying half. If, say, your income taking account child maintenance is, say, £25K and his net income after paying child maintenance iby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Financial agreement advice - 6 months ago
The net value of any property is what is relevant so in the case of house B that means what you could expect to receive after any costs of sale and any CGT due. If your wife cannot raise the cash to buy you out then the property would need to be sold, yes. There is no good reason to prioritise her needs over yours in this case.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Financial split questions - 6 months ago
The youngest child is 5 and your wife has effectively not worked for the last 7 years. Over time it might be reasonable to expect her to increase her hours but I doubt that will happen in a timescale that will meaningfully impact what you will have to pay out by way of spousal periodical payments in the short term.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Financial agreement advice - 6 months ago
Well, this will be treated as a marriage of 5.5 years so whether it is 'short' is debatable. Probably not. Having said that, there are no dependent children of this marriage, your wife earns more than you do and a significant proportion of the assets were owned by you prior to the start of the relationship. For what it is worth I don' think the chattels will be treated as cash.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Financial agreement advice - 6 months ago
>>the advice she has been given is that a 50/50 split of all assets is the likely outcome. You should always take, 'My solicitor has said' with a large pinch of salt. Usually statements like these are self serving and may or may not reflect the actual advice that has been given. You say you have been married for 3.5 years but also that you cohabited prior to marriage. You dby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Financial split questions - 6 months ago
1. Bearing in mind the ages of the children and the history of your respective earnings during the marriage I doubt whether you could insist your wife does more hours in the short term. It may be reasonable to expect her to do so when the children are older and/or if it could be done without affecting child care arrangements. 2. I doubt that your wife would get more of the capital by insistingby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Divorce Financial Advice - 6 months ago
>>The gift was signed by a solicitor like a prenup, where I couldnt take that money if we split. Well, I think you will find that now doesn't amount to a heap of beans because of the length of the relationship. Although it is true that courts now do attach more importance to prenuptial agreements than they used to the fact is that too much water has passed under the bridge for thisby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Divorce Financial Advice - 6 months ago
You do not say how long you and your wife have been together, the ages of the children and whether your wife could actually increase her hours. These things (and perhaps others) would be relevant to how this pans out. Assuming that the matrimonial home is jointly owned and that her mother's gift contributed to the purchase of that property it is not actually the case that your wife shouldby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Instructing a solicitor - 7 months ago
>>I guess the key for me is not to get too excited that the final arrangements for the kids are not in place straight away Correct. Issues to do with children are often in the forefront of people's mind as problems but (a) they do tend to resolve themselves over time once the divorce and financial issues have been settled and (b) courts recognise this and so do not generally get invby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Instructing a solicitor - 7 months ago
For the divorce itself the solicitor will need basic information such as the marriage certificate postal and email addresses. To give basic information about the financial issues arising from the marriage a solicitor will need to know the basic financial circumstances of you and your wife in terms of income, assets, pensions and liabilities as well as other information which you think may beby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Should I move out of the family home? - 7 months ago
If the marriage is over you will probably find that after you have applied for a divorce there will be more focus to your discussions with your wife. Merely talking about a divorce does not have the same effect. Many people bury their head in the sand when it is just talk. Actually issuing an application for divorce will focus minds. Also, within the context of divorce there are procedures availaby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Financial split - 7 months ago
If there are no dependent children a situation like this would normally be resolved by putting you each back as near as possible to the situation you were in before you were married. Unless you cohabited for a long time before marriage this is a short marriage and you each earn much the same. In broad terms it looks as though you would get back to the situation before you were married would beby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: Should I move out of the family home? - 7 months ago
If the marriage is over it is better to apply for divorce sooner rather than later. The sooner you do it the sooner you can both put it behind you and move on with the rest of your lives. In general it is better to remain in the former matrimonial home until all the issues arsing from the marriage have been formally and finally resolved. There are two main reasons for this:- 1. If at all poby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: "Minutes of Agreement" or "Separation Agreement" - 7 months ago
Like I said, you should ask a solicitor to formalise any agreement who will know exactly what to do in order to turn it into a court order.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: "Minutes of Agreement" or "Separation Agreement" - 7 months ago
A court order embodying a final settlement of the financial issues arising from a divorce only becomes enforceable upon decree absolute so in practice one is obliged to apply for decree absolute once a final order has been made about financial issues.by David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: House Sale following divorce - 7 months ago
The mortgage can be regarded as the equivalent as rent. You would have the benefit of living there while he did not. Furthermore you would be occupying a property half owned by him so in principle he could ask you for an occupation rent. For these various reasons, yes, he will entitled to the same share at the time of sale as he is entitled to now (unless, of course, something out of the blue hapby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum
Re: "Minutes of Agreement" or "Separation Agreement" - 7 months ago
>>My question is can we draft the "Minutes of Agreement" or "Separation Agreement" our self. Can this be made as a court order without going through our lawyers? What should be our next step to speed things up.<< You would be extremely unwise to do that because you might very easily unwittingly enter into something very prejudicial. There is nothing stopping youby David Terry - UK Divorce Forum