Child arrangements order advice

I'm in the process of getting divorced.

I live with my STBX in the family home, work from home and spend as much time as I can with my kids. I have a very flexible work schedule that enables me to fit my working day around childcare.

Unfortunately, my STBX is trying to limit the amount of time I have with my children. I have suggested a 50/50 split but she would rather have a 5/2 split. There is no reason not to have a 50/50 split other than the fact that she doesn't want it. She spends around 3 nights per week at her boyfriend's house so the children are used to spending time with both of us.

What are your experiences of getting a child arrangements order through the family court? My goal is for 50/50 custody. Is this reasonable given there is no reason why the children can't spend an equal amount of time with each parent?

You do not say:-

1. How old the children are or
2. What role your STBX currently plays in child care and whether there is any factor other than you which prevents her looking after the children.

Our children are 6 and 9.

Since the separation 2 years ago, I have worked flexibly and we have shared child care equally between us. I have offered to continue to work flexibly and reduce working hours in order to support my children when I look after them.

In answer to your question, there is no reason she is not able to look after the children.

We both play a very active role in our children's lives.

I can understand the arguments on both sides so a reality check would be useful to determine if my expectations are reasonable.

Then the residence of the children is only going to be shared equally if your ex agrees. She can clearly look after them, they are young children and she opposes equal residence. Many fathers could reduce their hours and earnings so that they can spend more time looking after the children but that is not a reason in itself why equally shared residence would be ordered against the wishes of the children's mother. Stability is important for children so it is normally better that children live with one parent and have contact with the other when the parents are separated. Also it would normally be better to try and preserve the children's standard of living where possible. Reducing one's hours and earnings would normally reduce their standard of living. I think it is unlikely you will get what you want.

Great, thanks for the advice.